What's your love language?

 Love Languages

            I was able to idetnify my love language and it is, Acts of Service.  I grabed this section from the Love Language Assessment that I took at the back of the book after I finished reading it, together with my husband. We really needed this at this time in our marriage. It's not like we're struggling a lot, but any chance to re-look at your marriage is refreshing and good to do more often than not.  This book describes exactly what I need (and also expect) to have from my Spouse so that I know he cares about me.  Here is what my love language is, it says:  "Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an 'Acts of Service' person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you!” "Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter."  Now that I know what my love language is and from the information that I read about on my own love language, I have realized why certain behaviors affect me more than others.  I can say that I have a better perspective with why I expect certain things from my Husband - and even more importantly, how I can let the other less important ones go.  

            I was able to identify 5 others in my life and their "love language."  Number one is my Husband, and his love language was a toss up of more than one that he tied with a high score on.  They were Words of Affirmation, Quality Time and Physical Touch.  For my Dad his is Receiving Gifts, My Mom's is Quality Time, My sister is Receiving Gifts, and My brother is Words of Affirmation.  

            My plan that I chose was to speak to my Husband's love language for two weeks - and I decided to do two things that would improve our love language to each other.  We have been good at showing our love to one another and also in new ways but this was a necessary event to have take place for us.  I wanted to make sure that I was speaking to my Husband in his love language.  Speaking with words of affirmation is something that I will always have to work and improve - it is a life long process showing my love in new ways to him.  I can always improve but once harsh words are spoken it is hard to take it back fully mean and unkind words hurt and diminish the soul insults are shattering- they even diminish my husband's soul I must always be quick to say "I'm sorry," and that was the first act of "love" that I did to him.  Whenever something would come up (whatever it may be), I was quick to apologize and acted fast in saying "I love you."  When he hears this it made for a happier spirit to take place and a healthier relationship between us to keep growing.  The second act of love that I did was showing more of my love to him through 'actions,' because in his love language actions speak louder than words.  So I wanted to try something in this way for him.  I decided that I would randomly put a note on the bathroom mirror, and note on the steering wheel in our car, one in his dresser drawer, on his tie rack, even in his shoe.  And I wrote on each note why I loved him...I knew that this would be a memory that would never be forgotten in our life together.  It will become something that is talked about when we are older & each note was saved.  He really did appreciate having this happen to him because, let's face it, I can really suck at expression my love to him.  Yes, I do tell him how much I truly do love him, but showing it through actions is just as important.  It was incredible to witness our love growing that much more as a result. Our love language will be a life long journey for us, but we did come that much closer to understanding what each of our own 'language of love' is. And together we will be better at striving to achieve our divine goal of having a relationship that endures to the end - with both of our hearts equally yoked together.